American television has lost a giant this week.
Well, a giant source of amusement that is.
Sarah Palin has ended her contract with Fox News and with it our regular source of amusement and fascination with the words formed and spoken by Sarah Palin. Here are some of her shining moments. She will be missed dearly, especially by late night comedians, that is unless she's planning a stab at 2016 which can only mean more Tina Fey-Amy Poehler SNL skits to look forward to.
1. Rahm Emannuel and Family Guy can't say "retard" but Limbaugh can, because Limbaugh is a satirist.
Why does Rush Limbaugh get the exception for the use of this derogatory phrase, when in fact his audience is probably more susceptible to repeating his way of thinking? Rahm Emmanuel can't use it in a moment of frustration and Family Guy can't use it as part of a joke, but Rush Limbaugh is a true satirist.
2. "I voted for the cheerful one"
This one has a few winners - Newt Gingrich was her choice for who we need to "lead us in battle ... to the swearing in ceremony," and how the lamestream media tries to "goad the candidates to talk about condoms" instead of the issues. Obviously.
3. "We would create law based on the God of the Bible and the Ten Commandments. It's pretty simple."
Palin tries to argue that the controversy around The National Day of Prayer is going against our unalienable rights that have been handed down from God, via the Founding Fathers, and is based on Judeo-Christian beliefs. To citizens from other religions, "Yay, welcome to America!" Bonus from Bill O'Reilly: "America has, as they say in California, evolved." Yes.
4. "If [the Tea Party were] really domestic terrorists, President Obama would want to pal around with us."
Sarah Palin's defense of the Tea Party sounds more like a repressed desire to be besties with President Obama. Also, radio hosts are also terrorists at 3:40 and Sarah Palin is sticking up for them.
5. "Well first of all, Nancy Pelosi is a dingbat."
Sarah Palin and Sean Hannity discuss the Supreme Court's decision to uphold the Affordable Care Act, which can be simply (and then ramblingly) explained by the fact that Nancy Pelosi is a dingbat. If this was elementary school, this would have been opening salvo of epic proportions.
6. Affordable Care Act is "Treachery"
All the messages she's receiving about the Affordable Care Act from her Twitter fans are all correct in their legal definition of "treachery" because they're coming from Real America patriots, and she just had to get out there and say it.
7. "Are we just a bunch of numbskulls out here in the heartland of America?"
Hear that First Lady Michelle Obama? The heartland of America knows how to reads jobs reports. Ok?