Donald Trump Hair: Quit Criticizing It


If you like pop culture and humor, you might be overly-familiar with the hair of Donald Trump. At a physical level, there are many descriptors, I concede. The mop on top of the real-estate tycoon, reality TV star, and “presidential hopeful” is more color than substance, swooping upward and inward like a tiny, stationary jet stream.

For those who follow the storied verse of the hair, at this point in time, that famous overly-primped patch of dead protein has just had its very existence brought into question. On Thursday, Gawker ran a story featuring video evidence that it may be a wig. This claim was fully disproved in the clip below, but the lingering obsession with the hair still remains.

I would like to make a personal plea: Leave Donald’s hair alone! Doesn’t it look like it has been through enough? The burn of the limelight has melted not just the essential oils, but any remaining shred of dignity that hadn’t yet commoditized by the man attached to said hair. Has Trump not done enough things that are more worthy of mockery, besides having a strange ‘do?

Why do we care so much? In the grand scheme of things, the Donald has done so much to attract our attention that it is inevitable we give it to him. As is tradition here in the United States, this attention will inevitably be negative, superficial, or both. Given, Donald deserves the large-scale derision that accompanies any public appearance of his, yet still, he stands as proof that nobody can defy image-consciousness and subsequent tongue-lashing, especially our nation’s famous.

Optimistically thinking, there is some kind of dark parity that can be gleaned from the vain mockery of Trump, a practice of equal-opportunity bashing, if you will. Rich white men are thought to be rendered bulletproof by the system, and there is validity to this line of thought, but not even a billionaire can dodge a well delivered punch-line.

I applaud Donald for his shameless courage. De facto, he is baiting us to mock him, and, in the case of the video above, graciously laughing with us. And, there is something to be said about the rest of the one percent’s lack of imagination in the looks department. Have you seen what Foster Freiss, or the Koch brothers? They may as well be identical.