He's the man who "lives vicariously through [himself]" and "once had an awkward moment, just to see how it felt." One year ago, I wrote this PolicyMic piece about the Dos Equis beer ad icon, "the most interesting man in the world." It's about time to revisit him and appreciate a few more things about the guy who police officers sometimes question "just because they find [him] interesting." In this case, I made these "facts" up — he's not real, after all — but I can only imagine that they'd be true if he were.
1. When he skydives, the hand of God ensures a safe landing.
2. When he attends a funeral, he receives flowers.
3. When he goes to baseball games, he signs autographs for the players.
4. In golf, his par score is 63, he only plays courses that install smaller holes, and his caddy pays him to carry his clubs.
5. A special museum was built to preserve hair cut by his barber and toenail clippings from his pedicures.
6. Wherever he goes, a toilet is cleaned and designated for his exclusive use.
7. His women always raise the toilet seat in his home.
8. Every time he visits a new place, he gets a key to the city.
9. Airlines he flies on have installed one love seat for him on all their planes.
10. When he has an unsuccessful moment with a woman, she apologizes.
11. When he visits Rome, the Pope insists he tour the city in his Pope-mobile.
12. He never drinks wine or eats cheese that is younger than he is.
13. When he checks into a hotel, he receives an entire wing so other customers do not have to listen to women thanking him all night long.