The Comments Tumblr is Amazing

ByKamran Rosen

In the depraved wasteland that is the internet in the 21st century, porn has become more popular than ever. But while most of us enjoy our alone time and then quietly move on with the rest of our day, there are a few who deem it necessary not only to watch porn, but to leave their most eloquent thoughts on the site. As a result, someone created a tumblr featuring stock photos with some of the best and brightest insights from pornhub users. I now proudly present the 12 funniest safe-for-work stock photos from the tumblr.

1. The emphatic skeptic

This individual, ever the skeptic about the real life applicability of certain porn-depicted fantasies, has no problem emphatically voicing his concern. "The delivery boy stuck his sausage through the pizza box? But, how did he avoid the paper cuts?"

2. The trashy porn-music aficionado

This man, unfazed by the copious amount of nudity and lascivious sexual acts occurring mere inches away from his face, just really wants to know the name of this song. Which leaves the viewer wondering, has he ever heard actual music before?

3. The old-schooler

This guy, tired of all the crazy sub-genres out there (BBW anyone?) is just happy to see an old school, traditional plowing. 

4. The British gentleman porn enthusiast

By golly! I find I do fancy this young hen's mammary region. I do ponder if she has participated in other productions, and I must inquire as to her surname immediately. 

5. I can haz good commentz?

This viewer, half meme and half cat, wants to communicate his/her emotions, but has been reduced to feline like grammar after their 18th hour submerged in the depths of Pornhub's weirder sections.  

6. The film critic

This man does not mess around. He doesn't fall for HD gimmicks, fake orgasms, or big name stars (take that, Lisa Ann!). He wants two things: plots and breasts. Scorn him in one area, and you will surely rue the oversight ... in the form of a scathing Pornhub comment. 

7. The Southern Ginger

Combining two of America's most-maligned stereotypes, this Southern ginger manages to invoke the a good chunk of the internet's wrath with one mere sentence. Because the only thing worse than incest, is ginger incest. 

8. The sound expert

Ahhh, the well versed aural connoisseur of pornography. Did you hear the peacock like screech @13:25? How about the dog bark with a hint of wheezing @ 10:13? Well just WAIT for the 29 minute mark...

9. The doctor

Ever concerned about the health of his surgery addled, STD ridden subjects, the Pornhub resident doctor is quick to point out any potentially serious health hazards of the actors involved....but only very briefly, and by misspelling the diagnosis.

10. The innocent Canadian

Everyone loves this guy. This innocent northern Canadian has just emerged from his 20 year hibernation to discover his Hustler magazines have all been replaced by something called "the internet." His excitement and PG comments remind us of our first time on Pornhub, and we envy it. So go ahead and feel the heat, bro.

11. The guy who forgot he's not on Yahoo! answers

Let's be honest, anyone who's even remotely internet-savvy, knows that Yahoo! Answers is easily the most reliable source of information on the web; it has answers to literally EVERYTHING (including this!) Unfortunately for this guy, he's forgotten that unlike the selfless patrons of Yahoo! Answers, the rest of the internet really doesn't give a crap about helping you out with your problem. 

12. The guy who doesn't understand "no homo"

There are some things that you just can't ...  ahem ... "no homo." Asking for the names of the men whose members you are staring at whilst touching your own, is one of those things.