Just a normal dude having a normal conversation.

WASHINGTON, DC - JUNE 17: Rep. Matt Gaetz (R-FL) disagrees with remarks by Rep. Cedric Richmond (D-L...
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Here is Matt Gaetz musing about gnawing at Nancy Pelosi’s toenails

One of the most important skills a politician can possess is the ability to captivate an audience by painting vivid rhetorical pictures to inflame the imagination. Think Hubert H. Humphrey’s 1948 DNC speech, or Mario Cuomo’s 1984 DNC keynote address, or Ronald Reagan’s 1988 State of the Union. For better or worse, a politician who can inspire through oratory flourishes is a politician who understands their job. And by that measure alone, Florida Republican congressman and credibly accused sexual abuser Matt Gaetz is, in his own way, an incredibly effective politician.

I mean, I think we can all appreciate the sheer creative mastery on display here, as Gaetz and fellow Republican Rep. Marjorie “Christian nationalism ... will actually be the movement that stops the school shootings” Taylor Greene offered audiences a peek into their Lovecraftian psyches while discussing their least favorite colleagues on a live feed of Greene’s podcast, which she shared Tuesday.

“Just to bring this into technicolor for you ... ” Wow, thanks Matt!!

First off, it takes a world-class asshole to sit down and record a podcast about which one of your coworkers you hate the most. Seriously. Try it yourself, and see what happens when you show up at work the next day. But also, it’s impressive — if a bit suspect — just how quickly Gaetz pivoted to not only sponge-bathing Nancy Pelosi, but also gnawing at her toenails as his ne plus ultra of personal depravity. Is this something to which he’s given previous and intensive thought, or is he just that good at conjuring up vaguely sexist, ageist polemics for no purpose beyond their ostensible shock value?

Either way, what’s important now is that we all embark on some regimen of self-care to erase the image of Matt Gaetz chomping at anyone’s toenails from our poor, fragile minds. Whatever you’ve gotta do to wipe your brain clean, go for it. Good luck.