If you're shady AF, you'll love these 42 clever things on Amazon

Culture
ByClaire Epting
Updated: 
Originally Published: 

You don't have to be a secret agent to want a few sneaky devices in your life. In fact, it's never been easier to become a master of everyday deception, thanks to these extremely clever and useful things on Amazon.

Every item on this list uses a bit of practical magic to achieve life-changing results. For example, take a look at this digital voice recorder that doubles as a functional pen. It's an ultra-helpful way to remember a lecture or meeting, but it also provides a means to discreetly record your surroundings without anyone knowing.

Let's say you've got some personal items you want to stash away from the public eye. There are several things you can use to keep your possessions concealed, from these boxer briefs with a hidden pocket to this wall safe disguised as an air vent. Or, you can upgrade your current safe with a high-tech padlock that opens with the touch of your fingerprint.

Maybe you've learned not to trust strangers. (Or maybe strangers have learned not to trust you.) Either way, I've included a ton of inventive Amazon products below that will make you feel like one sly fox.

01

This secret pouch that attaches to your bra

This water-resistant silk pouch attaches to your bra with a snap closure, allowing you to secretly stash your cash and credit cards close to your body — without anyone knowing. Whether you're getting your groove on at the club or traveling to a new locale, you can be confident that your valuables are safe.

02

A screen protector designed for maximum privacy

Made with high-quality tempered glass, this smartphone screen protector keeps your most private information safe from wandering eyes. The screen is only visible when you're directly in front of it, while those sitting next to you won't be able to see a thing. Not to mention, the protector will keep your screen scratch-free.

03

A lockable safe that looks like an English dictionary

Keep your prized possessions secure by hiding them where no one would think to look: an English dictionary. This metal diversion safe looks exactly like a real book, complete with a faux leather cover. Covertly equipped with a small lock and key, the safe easily blends in with the other books on your shelf.

04

This note pad for passive-aggressive commentors

This stationery note pad from Knock Knock makes it oh-so easy to deliver the perfect passive-aggressive memo to your roommate, family member, or co-worker, without the fear of confrontation. Simply check some boxes, fill in some blanks, and let your clear (but subtle) message do the talking.

05

These cards that let you get revenge on bad parking jobs

Do poorly parked cars make your blood boil? If so, you'll love this set of snarky cards from Witty Yeti. Each card includes one of 10 insults targeted toward bad parkers, ready to be slipped under an unsuspecting windshield at a moment's notice. With 50 cards in a pack, you'll never have to scribble an angry note on top of a car again.

06

This CIA manual on the art of trickery and deception

To become a bonafide trickster, you've got to do your research. This step-by-step handbook was a top-secret training manual for CIA agents in the 1950s, but has since become available to spies and civilians alike. Learn all about covert communication and sleight of hand tricks as you delve into the mind of legendary magician and intelligence agent John Mullholland.

07

These hair clips that double as multi-purpose tools

Who says fashion can't be functional? These tactical hair clips double as mini rulers, screwdrivers, scrapers, and wrenches. Made out of stainless steel, these nifty little clips come in a set of 15 and can hold your bangs back just as easily as they can peel an orange or tighten a screw.

08

A USB security key that protects your online data

This USB security key adds a layer of protection while surfing the internet to boost privacy. Keep your online accounts safe from password theft, phishing, and hacking by plugging in Thetis' two-factor authentication device into your USB port. As an added bonus, its portable design allows you to hook it onto your key chain for easy portability.

09

A laptop screen cover for added privacy

If you take your laptop with you wherever you go, it's likely you don't want strangers peering at your screen. This privacy screen protector ensures that the only eyes on your screen are your own. The multi-layered cover makes your screen appear black at angles beyond 30 degrees. It's also reversible, so you can pick between a matte or glossy finish.

10

The odor eliminator spray that gets rid of stubborn smoke smells

Whether it's from a cigarette, joint, or campfire, the smell of smoke is notoriously difficult to get rid of indoors. This odor eliminator spray doesn't just mask the smell of smoke — it knocks it out completely. Keep a can in your car, your bedroom, or any other place you like to light up, and you're good to go.

11

These tiny Bluetooth earbuds that are barely noticeable

Gone are the days of clunky wired headsets. These discreet wireless Bluetooth earbuds are so small, you'll barely notice them there. Whether you're making a hands-free phone call in the office or listening to music at the gym, these mighty little units sit comfortably in your ears without feeling intrusive.

12

A sophisticated journal with a combination lock

Journaling is an awesome way to express your innermost thoughts, but it's not so awesome if prying eyes get a glimpse of your deepest desires. This journal with a combination lock takes away that possibility, making you the only one who can access your musings. Write more self-assuredly knowing that your words are yours and yours alone.

13

This wall safe disguised as an air vent

You can hide your valuables in plain sight with this wall safe disguised as an air vent. The paintable grill attaches to the unit using magnets for easy access, or screws on for more security. The inconspicuous design even includes a false wall to block the sight of your items behind the vent.

14

A hidden electronic lock for cabinets and drawers

This electric cabinet lock is a direct way to bolster your cupboards and drawers with extra security. After you install the battery-powered cabinet lock into your cabinet, just wave your programmable key fob in front of it to unlock. You'll feel like a CIA agent every time you head to the pantry.

15

These stealthy flasks hidden inside umbrella covers

If you're looking for a way to sneak alcohol into an event, it might be a good idea to check the weather report. If there's any chance of rain, you're in luck — these uniquely designed flasks looks exactly like a folded up umbrellas. The canisters hold up to 20 ounces of liquid, which can be poured out easily with the included spouts and funnels.

16

The portable lock you can use anywhere

Even if you already have a lock on your door, a portable door lock can make your room even safer and more private. The lock can be installed and removed in seconds, making it the ideal travel companion. It's especially useful while staying in a hotel or an Airbnb, giving you peace of mind so you can enjoy your vacation.

17

This frosted window film for your home or office

When living or working in close proximity to others, privacy becomes a big priority. If you want to keep your neighbors from taking a peek at your business, you can cover your windows with this frosted privacy film. Made from environmentally-friendly materials, this window cover offers seclusion while also allowing natural light to enter your room, and it attaches easily with the power of static cling.

  • Available sizes: 14
  • Available colors: 6

18

These comfy boxer briefs with a hidden pocket

These might look like an ordinary pair of men's underwear, but the ultra-soft boxer briefs actually have a zippered pocket built in. While your wallet can easily fall out of the back pocket or your jeans (or worse, get stolen), you can ensure that your cash, I.D. and credit cards will be secure in your boxers' built-in pouch.

  • Available sizes: Small — XX-Large

19

An infinity scarf with a zipper pocket

A solid-colored scarf can elevate any look while keeping you warm, but this particular infinity loop scarf goes a step further with a hidden zipper pocket for storage. While traveling, this jersey knit scarf's secret pouch can hold your phone, passport, cash, or car keys. Not to mention, it comes in 12 appealing shades from burgundy to sky blue.

  • Available colors: 12

20

The gift box that doubles as a brain teaser puzzle

The next time you give a small present to your S.O., sibling, or friend, really make them work for it. This beautiful handcrafted rosewood puzzle box requires the recipient to solve a brainteasing puzzle to reveal its contents. It's appropriate for those who love a little challenge, and the box makes for a nice hiding place for valuables once it's completely opened.

21

These black light markers that glow in the dark

These UV black light markers make it so easy to write secret messages to your friends. The non-toxic ink is invisible under regular light, but glows brightly under a UV black light. These red, yellow, and blue markers are also useful for marking your belongings at a black light event.

22

A digital voice recorder that's also a pen

When you're taking notes in class or at work, it can be frustrating trying to keep up. Luckily, this compact digital voice recorder is also a functional writing utensil (and nobody will even know you're recording). This incredible little device can hold 32 gigabytes of audio, which can then be transferred to your computer using the included USB cable.

23

The high-tech padlock that opens with your fingerprint

Regular padlocks can be time-consuming and cumbersome, especially if you use one daily. Take the hassle out of your daily routine with this Bluetooth padlock that opens with your fingerprint. The lock, which runs on a rechargeable battery, can be authorized for up to 15 users. Connect the device to your phone via Bluetooth, where you can control its settings on a mobile app.

24

These flasks that look exactly like tampons

Flasks come in all shapes and sizes, and these ones are especially creative. This set of five tampon flasks allows you to smuggle alcohol into festivals, clubs, and stadiums. Each leak-proof "booze tube" holds one ounce of liquid. All you have to do is fill them up and place them in the accompanying sleeves. It's a sneaky method, but it works.

25

These trendy hair scrunchies with a hidden pocket

If you've got any small items you want to stash, like a key or a few bills, these scrunchies with hidden pockets will do the trick. Sport one on your wrist or in your hair, and never lose your small valuables again. Plus, they add a fun touch to your outfit. They're a win-win.

26

A portable safe that's perfect for traveling

As much fun as it is to travel, it's also important to make sure you're doing it the safe way. Theft can happen to anyone, so it's a great idea to keep your precious items in a portable combination lock safe. This compact lock box is just the right size for a carry-on bag or suitcase.

27

This tote bag that lets you bring wine to the beach

If sipping wine by the ocean sounds like paradise, you need to check out this beach tote bag with a hidden wine pouch. The tote can discreetly hold up to two bottles of wine (it's up to you if they're reds, whites, or rosés), and the cleverly placed flap covers the wine spout until you're ready to pour a glass.

28

This personal straw that purifies water out in the wild

If you want to off the grid and head out into the wilderness, you'll want to make sure you have access to clean drinking water. Enter: This ingenious personal straw filter. It purifies water from lakes and streams on the spot. Just place the straw into the water and suck in. The microbiological filter removes virtually all bacteria and parasites before the water reaches your mouth, so it's completely safe for you to drink.

29

A tactical pen for self-defense

This aluminum tactical pen isn't joking around — its tip can break glass, ceramic, and even metal surfaces. While it's an advantageous self-defense tool, the pen also functions as a flashlight, bottle opener, screwdriver, hexagonal wrench, and writing utensil. It's a mini toolbox that's small enough to fit in your pocket.

30

A stainless steel water bottle that hides your stuff

Hydration is key, and so is securing your stuff on the go. With this stainless steel water bottle safe, you can do both. The tumbler is designed to hold 16 ounces of liquid in the top half, while the twist-off bottom half is reserved for your most important items.

31

These sliding webcam covers that prevent digital spying

These sleek metal webcam covers protect you against online hackers who may try to access your laptop's camera. Once you adhere the ergonomic cover to your webcam, you can slide it open to make yourself visible on camera. When you finish, slide it shut for total privacy. Take that, hackers.

32

A handy guide filled with survival hacks

Surviving in the great outdoors is no effortless task. You've got to to have stamina, and you can't be afraid to get crafty. This book of survival hacks is packed with over 200 ways to keep yourself alive using a variety of everyday household objects. If building a cookstove using a packet of alcohol-soaked ramen sounds up your alley, this is the book for you.

33

A door stop that works as a security alarm

Stop intruders in their tracks with this battery-powered door stop alarm. When propped under the door, the powerful alarm will sound off as soon as pressure is applied. Use it in your apartment or pack it in your bag when you travel. No matter where you are, you'll take comfort in knowing you're protected from trespassers.

34

This key-shaped pocket tool with a bunch of functions

We take our keys with us everywhere, so why not add some extra function to your key ring? This innovative key-shaped pocket tool has 16 different functions for any occasion. The stainless steel design features multiple wrenches, a bike spoke key, a bottle opener, a ruler, a protractor, and even a smoking pipe.

35

An anti-spy screen protector for your Apple Watch

An Apple Watch is basically a mini iPhone on your wrist, so you should take precautions to keep your private messages to yourself. This tiny anti-spy screen protector guards your smart watch screen from onlookers. The three-layer film also guarantees your screen will remain free of damage.

36

A balcony privacy shield for ultimate seclusion

A balcony should be a secluded space where you can unwind in peace. If you live up against other buildings, you should check out this weather-resistant privacy shield that isolates your balcony from neighbors and passersby. Enjoy your outdoor area without worrying about anyone watching you from afar.

37

A fire starter that's super easy to use

Whether you're an amateur camper or a budding survivalist, having a fire starter on hand can be a (literal) lifesaver. This fire starter uses a wax-infused hemp wick that ignites with a single spark. The fool-proof design keeps your fingers from getting burnt, so you can spend less time fussing over your fire and more time enjoying its warmth.

38

A realistic-looking rock that tucks away your spare key

Just by looking at it, you'd never guess that this realistic-looking rock could hold a spare key or USB key or a little stash of some kind. Once you put your things inside and place it in your garden, you've got a naturally disguised hiding spot. The bottom of the rock even has a sliding door that keeps your items from falling out.

39

A deceptive hanger pocket that fits underneath your clothes

If you're looking for a simple but surefire way to keep your valuables unseen, this hanger diversion safe is a suitable option. The pocket fits right underneath a jacket or coat and hangs in your closet. The storage space is 17 inches wide, which means there's plenty of room for your passport, wallet, keys, jewelry, and then some.

40

A nylon belt that conceals your cash

If a fanny pack is not your vibe, this money-hiding belt is a fantastic alternative. The classic nylon belt includes an interior zippered pouch that's just the right size for your cash. Just fold the bills lengthwise to fit them into your belt, and you're all set. Because the buckle is made of plastic, you can even wear it through airport security when traveling.

41

A survival kit that's fit for the great outdoors

If you're planning on spending any amount of time out in the wilderness, do yourself a favor and invest in this 15-in-one survival kit. Nature is unpredictable, and these multi-functional tools will prepare you for anything. Inside, you'll find items such as a tactical torch flashlight, an emergency thermal blanket, flint stones, a compass, and a survival whistle.

42

The security camera that streams to your phone

If you want to spy on your dog when you're away from home, this security camera will be your new best friend. It streams live footage to your phone and automatically records 12-second video clips when motion is detected. Plus, it has two-way audio, so you can talk to whoever's on your front doorstep, or tell your pup to get off the couch.