For your Thanksgiving safety, a list of recalled foods to avoid this week

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Some of you overachievers are already cooking for a meal that’s two whole days away. I commend you for your planning skills, but please watch out for these food recalls so you don't have anything shady on your table during Thanksgiving. Sure, nothing says, “I’m resentful about my terrible childhood,” quite like food poisoning, but perhaps consider a less dangerous means of communicating with your friends and family.

Romaine Lettuce

There are massive recalls on romaine lettuce right now. This leafy green has been linked to 17 people who contracted E. Coli. 75,000 pounds has been taken off the shelves, but if you have any on hand, you might want to dispose of it just in case, especially if it was grown in Salinas, California. Consider replacing it with arugula, a.k.a. rocket, which has been shown to have notable health benefits.

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Raspberries and blackberries

An outbreak of Hepatitis A has been potentially linked to frozen raspberries and blackberries sold by Fresh Thyme. These berries come from Illinois, but illnesses that may have resulted from consuming these products have been reported in Wisconsin, Nebraska, and Indiana.

Raw pork

An Illinois company recalled 515,000 pounds of raw pork because it didn’t pass inspection before it went to market. Check your meat freezer for these products. There haven’t yet been any links to health concerns, but let’s be real, getting sick from bad pork tends to have some unsavory consequences.

Cheese Nips

Some 11-ounce packages of Cheese Nips may contain small pieces of yellow plastic, according to authorities. Boxes that have a "best by" date of May 18, 19, or 20, 2020, could be contaminated. Also, c’mon y’all, Cheese Nips? We’re grown-ups now. Cheez-Its are vastly superior.

Cottage Cheese

Kraft Heinz has recalled almost 9,500 cases of three different varieties of cottage cheese after a consumer reported finding a piece of red plastic in their curds. No illnesses have been reported, but in case you have some cottage cheese in your fridge, the use by date on the recalled containers is December 10, 2019

Nestle Cookie Dough

Some packages of Nestle cookie dough may contain bits of rubber. Nestle voluntarily recalled the ready to bake items, which are listed here. You can still eat the already-baked cookies, though, which is small consolation for those of us who prefer the raw deal.

Ground beef

A New Jersey company had to recall 115,000 pounds of ground beef products that may contain plastic. Before you start feeling elitist about how you always buy the “good meat,” please note that this is the fancy, organic grass-fed kind of ground beef.

Vegetables

Over 100 vegetable products were recalled over possible Listeria contamination, according to CNN. The number of veggies recalled is giant and includes major food companies like Del Monte and Trader Joe’s, so make sure to check the list. You are never going to get your family to buy into your vegan keto diet if you poison them.