Joseph Lamour

Bio

Washington DC native Joseph Lamour is a writer, an artist, and a musician — sometimes all at once. Joe loves to write about the intersection of social issues and pop culture, food, love, and strange things on the Internet. You can see his words on MTV news, Apartment Therapy, and others in addition to Mic. A graduate of the Rhode Island School of Design, Joe's work has been displayed in galleries in New York and DC, the Pentagon, Smithsonian, the Pentagon, and the White House (under Obama, of course). You‘ll probably hear him singing if you’re near him for more than 45 minutes.
Are there any drugs I shouldn't mix with my COVID-19 vaccine?
By Joseph Lamour
This last week in a tiny pharmacy, I was vaccinated against COVID-19 — a once in a lifetime upgrade, via Moderna. The shots from Pfizer-BioNTech, or Johnson & Johnson would also have been welcome, too, of course. While I waited for my turn to get…
Easter is one of the few days I can flout gender norms without my parents' judgement
By Joseph Lamour
I wear the same shirt every Easter: It’s a lavender button-down by Saturdays NYC. It’s sold as a men’s shirt by a fashion label that doesn’t stray too far from the masculine, but whenever I wear it around my parents, they either ask me if I’m…
Your shrinking pandemic friend group is actually a good thing
By Joseph Lamour
COVID-19 has done a number on our social lives. This terrible, no good, very bad pandemic has been around for more than a year and during this time, you might’ve decided to cut the fat on your friend circle (or that may have happened naturally since…
It's hard to say goodbye to a boat we got this horny for
By Joseph Lamour
Just like the characters in E. L. James's seminal literary classic Fifty Shades Freed wanted to be freed from their demons, the Ever Given is now happily unmoored, floating along towards its intended destination. And just like Anastasia Steele with…
Please, someone give me a glass of the wine aged in space
By Joseph Lamour
The expanse of outer space has always been intriguing to humankind, to say the least. And now that billionaires are getting into the space race, there's a certain credence to the luxury side of space exploration. That’s why, maybe, astronauts have…
Why I'm going to start celebrating my queeriversary
By Joseph Lamour
A couple of weeks ago, I came out, again. You see, my parents knew about my status as a member of the LGBTQ community (to be specific, that I’m a gay man) because I told them when I was 16. Somehow, years later, I found that they had put me back in…
From free weed to doughnuts, vaccine marketing is a win for everyone right now
By Joseph Lamour
In my state of residence, I become eligible for the vaccine pretty soon. And even though I was already planning to get vaxxed, there appear to be all kinds of incentives cropping up that make me even more enthusiastic about it. A certain venerable…
Europe's third wave of COVID-19 is a clear warning for the U.S.
By Joseph Lamour
It’s been a year since this pandemic began for us. Perhaps if we had better leadership last year, the only waves we’d be worried about right now would be low tide on Miami Beach (or whichever spring destination your heart chose). But here we are,…
The TikTok hot sauce challenge is not for dogs, you monsters
By Joseph Lamour
What would you do if a friend handed you a delicious-looking piece of chicken, and then when you ravenously bit into it, you tasted spicy, fiery doom? You would find a new friend, wouldn’t you? Unfortunately for dogs they don’t have that option,…
There's an alarming spike in liver disease among young women. Is pandemic drinking to blame?
By Joseph Lamour
In the beginning of the pandemic, many of us knew — and feared — that since our vices would go unseen by many in a quarantine lifestyle, that they would go on unabated. Faced with absurdly high levels of stress, grief, and sheet boredom, many of us…
The psychology behind why we love to hate-read
By Joseph Lamour
I just got an online subscription to the Wall Street Journal. And while I’m sure my future is going to be full of informative, incisive articles on all things finance, as a progressive gay Black man of modest means I don’t know why I’m paying to…
I'm so sorry but everyone needs to skip spring break this year
By Joseph Lamour
Although this current time we live in might seem like one long day punctuated by sporadic naps, a year has passed since the coronavirus reached our shores. And this March, usually a time when college students (and people who miss college) settle on…
Your morning wood (or lack thereof) says a lot about your health
By Joseph Lamour
The colloquial phrase, “the early bird catches the worm” must refer to penises because they are, universally, early risers. More often than not, a dick will awaken before you do, and morning wood is simply a fact of life. Penis-havers everywhere are…
Childhood snacks are the perfect pandemic comfort food
By Joseph Lamour
When I was a kid, one of the most amazing commercials ever created would run in between reruns of Seinfeld and Friends. The short, sexy saxophone-infused ad for Viennetta, a British frozen dessert cake, is at the same time deeply hilarious, and…
A new book warns falling sperm counts could lead to human extinction
By Joseph Lamour
“When infertility threatens mankind with extinction, the survival for Earth's population falls on one disillusioned bureaucrat,” Siri tells me, when I ask her for a synopsis of the 2006 film, Children of Men. This week, I found that our reality…
Our coronavirus precautions made the flu disappear this year
By Joseph Lamour
We’re a full year into the coronavirus pandemic in the United States, although the “feels like” temperature on that is 20,427 years. As we around the bend on February, there's some good news: The flu has virtually disappeared this season; reports…
How do I come out for the second time?
By Joseph Lamour
My sister and I have a coded phrasing that we use when we discuss queerness around our parents. “When he called me ‘sweetie,’ I knew his shoes must be shiny,” my sister Loree will say, to avoid the inevitable winces from our religious kin. We both…
The natural wine world is white as hell. These BIPOC sommeliers are changing that
By Joseph Lamour
What’s whiter: a riesling, a Gewürztraminer, or the people who make either of them? That might feel like a pretty blatant jab but face it, the wine industry has historically been an overwhelmingly caucasian institution. This, thankfully, is…
Lil Nas X’s revealing TikToks tell his story of fame, depression, and "contemplating ending it all"
By Joseph Lamour
Country-rap doyen, space elf, and Wrangler model Lil Nas X is the latest celebrity to open up about his mental health struggles. It’s increasingly clear that if more people were this candid about depression, the still-permeating stigma would…
To all the people handling the pandemic well: what's your deal?
By Joseph Lamour
We’re a year into the pandemic and I have officially fallen from my pedestal of hermit-in-quarantine bliss. This tumble was both figurative and literal: Last weekend, midnight snack in hand — a sandwich, two cans of Dr. Pepper, and a bowl of ice…